Monday, March 18, 2013

Nine Months

Urban Moo Cow
What's in a number?
Gotcha! You thought I was going to say I was pregnant, right? Admit it!

Well, I'm not.

Nine months refers to something else in my life. I've noticed over the years that it takes me about nine months to settle into anything new -- a job, an apartment, a relationship -- before I feel comfortable.

I'm inevitably flustered the first few months; no matter what, I feel like I'm drowning, like I need to change, like what I'm doing isn't worth all the trouble. But then, at around six months, I start to feel a little more in control. And by nine months, I belong in my new space.

It is not lost on me that nine months is also the amount of time a human woman gestates her offspring. Are they related? I can't be sure.

We moved to Brooklyn in May 2012. Since then, I've written about freaking out at the pollution from the BQE, coping with the less convenient public transit in my neighborhood and succeeding and failing to make new mom friends.

(Incidentally, Stephanie Lucianovic from Grub Report had an excellent post in the New York Times's Motherlode blog on "dating" moms. Check it out.)

June-July-August -- (I'm counting on my fingers right now) -- September-October-November-December-January-February.

February was nine months.

This past month, right on cue, I've begun to feel settled in Brooklyn. I'm (almost) used to the post-industrial wasteland in which we find ourselves; I've begun to figure out the shortest ways to get places -- the best buses, the fastest routes; I finally have a few women in the neighborhood whom I can truly call friends. (Thank you, ND, SC, KC and JM.)

And now, we are contemplating moving. The school situation is fraught in New York, and I'm making a mere pittance -- even less than a pittance, sometimes -- with writing (anyone want to hire me...? Bueller...?).

Perhaps I will go back to work full-time; or more accurately, perhaps I will take on another full-time job. Perhaps we will move to the soul-crushing suburbs. Perhaps I will find that second full-time job in the suburbs and move back to Manhattan for a slightly easier reverse commute.

All of these options are on the table. None is particularly inspiring.

Then again, it will only take me nine months to get used to the next phase, so what's the worry?

If only I could be so zen.

What say you?

Image courtesy of Chaiwat /